Well, it’s one week until D-day (or I guess I should say “C-day”), and it’s JoeKim’s birthday. So, I got him the gift that keeps on giving.
I figure I’ll be out of commission for 6 weeks at least, and even then, I can’t imagine that I will be in the mood for romance (or any seamier derivation thereof) with 3 hours of sleep a night. So, I’m going to help him help his own cause. I mean, I pass 3 adult bookstores on my way to the el every evening, so I should put their convenience to good use. A co-worker came with me, ostensibly because she felt that I shouldn’t go alone, but she confided in me that actually she just wanted to go and would never have the chutzpah to go on her own, and when I told her I was going, just wanted to see what it was like. We picked the most well lit of the three, with cheery “Happy Halloween” decorations on the door. Like people might go trick or treating there or something. It was fairly innocuous, the only skeevy part being the booths in the back where you have to buy tokens to get in. Al the preview booths were full for the entire time we were there. “Just don’t touch anything.” I told my colleague. But, the saleswoman was very nice and helpful, and went so far as to tell me about the adult video sale in progress. And they say that customer service is dying.
It was pretty fun to waddle into an adult bookstore with my giant belly. Somehow I feel like I kind of have immunity, like people give me the benefit of the doubt. “Look at that pervert going into the adult bookstore — oh, wait, she’s pregnant. She must not be a pervert.” I don’t know why I feel like that, or if people really think that way, but that’s what happens in my mind. And it was also funny to me to go to the hippie mom store and buy more earth mother cloth diapers and know that I was putting them next to “Jenna Loves Brianna” in my bag. I had a nice secret smile about that one.
This is probably also the best day to recount all the great things that Joe does. How he sings and talks to the baby all the time, how he compliments me profusely every day and thanks me for being a good mom, how he never gets annoyed when I complain for the umpteenth time about not having a beer for 9 months, how he makes me breakfast (and sometimes dinner) in bed, how he pays attention to how tired I am and takes over whatever I’m doing so that I can go lie down, how he’s reading The Essential C-Section Guide on the el every morning and night. And how I really realized during the version, when I was about to pass out because my blood pressure was so low, and he came in the room, how wonderful and nice it is to have someone you can look at when you’re about to pass out, and know that you can trust them to make it better. It was really scary at first to know I would depend on Joe so much for things because of pregnancy and a baby. Now, it’s just a realy comforting feeling, which is a nice change.
So, happy birthday, JoeKim. Enjoy the porn.