It is a week of change here at the Landes-Kim household. Elijah has been extubated, and has now moved from a ventilator that breathes for him to one that does less work but still gives him oxygen (if you just can’t get enough Eli, check out our blog about HIM at http://manduchronicles.blogspot.com/. This one is all about ME, being an only child and all), I am getting ready to go back to work in a week, and Darwin has finally learned how to climb out of his crib, and now sleeps on a mattress on the floor. I am really ready for like 3 years of boring sameness.
All the transitions have their good and bad points, like everything else in life. Eli’s new respirator (called a CPAP) is less invasive than the first one, and is a definitely step forward, but it means that his oxygen levels drop more often until he gets used to it. Today, he had a really up and down day, with some moments of apnea, where it caused his heart rate to drop, as well, which is totally stress-inducing. But, the doctors all tell us, every time we talk to them, “he’s doing great.” So we just have to trust them on it.
Darwin’s new sleeping situation has so far been pretty good. Last night was his first night without the crib, and he slept through the night fine, and there wasn’t too much battle at bedtime. I think because he sleeps on a cot at daycare already, he’s kind of used to it. But it sure was a battle at naptime, and now when there is a battle, we’re not sure what to do. We used to just stick him in the crib and let him cry (please don’t call the authorities. I promise we’re usually perfectly responsible parents. Well, mostly usually). Now, when we leave him in his room with the door closed, there’s all kinds of bumps and crashes, and we imagine the worst and go in — and he’s got us. “one more book, Daddy?” “ore songs, Mommy?” Sigh. We can’t really leave the door open with a baby gate or something, because his room is right next to the kitchen, and we’re in there all the time and would wake him up or he’d open his eyes and see us and it would be all over. And if we started spying in the windows of our own house, the neighbors would probably begin to talk. Like they don’t already. But, hopefully things will keep being OK. That seems to be my mantra lately, “hopefully, things will keep being OK.”
Of course, the most stressful (because it’s all about ME) is the going back to work. It’s good, because in some ways I miss the structure of work, and the having something else to occupy my mind, and the ability to use some higher level thinking skills, rather than just “does mustard yellow count as a dark or a light?” when I’m doing laundry. But, along with the structure comes a schedule, and the stress of knowing I have to get to work by 8, have to go into a makeshift private room to pump breast milk 2 times a day, and get to the hospital for lunch (and pump again), and then get to daycare before they close — oh, and actually work a full day and get my job done. Yikes. But hopefully, just like with Eli and Darwin, once I get used to it, I’ll settle in. But I’m a much older dog than they are, so I’m just hoping that this new trick can be quickly learned!